There have been many doors to open these last 24 years. Open doors to the birth of children. Open doors to kindergarten. (One child took several months to negotiate that door) Open doors to reading and education and schooling. Open doors to dating. Open doors to driving the car. (Today we prayerfully, carefully drove through busy traffic on the freeway with a new driver.) Open doors to universities. Open doors to missions, and eventually open doors to marriage.
But to open doors in front of you means closing doors behind you. Doors begin closing to babyhood, toddlerhood, childhood and youth. Those precious moments of innocence that belong to young spirits are so joyous to me. And yet, new joy comes with each season. I see my little boy going, but not so long in the distance, maybe my front door will open and coming in will be little boys led by their dad, now a man.
And so, one by one, they are flying, on their own. I’ve seen their growth! I’ve seen their becoming! My daughter sent me these words shortly after she arrived in the Argentine Mission Home:
“Come to the edge, he said. They said: We are afraid. Come to the edge, he said. They came. He pushed them and they flew.” (Guillaume Apollinaire) Isn't that just beautiful? I feel like that is what the Lord is doing for me...he is taking me to the edge, just like you said Mom, in Indiana Jones, where they step off the cliff and then the bridge appears.Years ago one child said to a big brother as they left for school, “When you come home, we could play together and be friends!” My thoughts to my children are, “When you come back home and you have wisdom, compassion and capacity, and a host of talents and virtues and maybe don't need me so much anymore, can we still be friends? I’ve experienced that. It is amazing how much richer our relationships are and how great our joint capacity is. Now we can build so much more than a sandcastle! They are my best friends!
Perhaps one of the things I loved most about the young season was the feeling that we are all family – together - and safe at home. I believe one of the most joyous feelings that can ever be had must be to come back to that Eternal Home. Safe at that Home at last. When Joseph was two years old he said, “Mommy, I’m proud of you. I’m proud of you when you come home.”
I will not shrink! Yes! I’ll fling open that door wide! Wider and still wider. Embrace its possibilities and rejoice in the opportunities! Coming. Going. That is the way it is supposed to be. Fly! Grow! Become!
And the hope is that Someone in an Eternal Heavenly Home will say. “I’m proud of all of you. I’m proud of you when you come home.”
