Where do answers begin for the national unrest, violence, and rioting? How do wrongs get righted? How does a nation heal from the divide and racial tension? If violence is met with more violence, we have more violence. What if, the acknowledgement of our inhumanity and racist practices brought us to personal reflection and thoughtful kind action instead? What if each of us considered those we know of differing cultures or races and we reached out in kindness? What if we made necessary adjustments in our capacity to love and respect others? What if our awareness brought us to engage in acts of kindness or service we might not have otherwise done?
From USA Today: Jamil Zaki, a Stanford professor who studies kindness, explained its role in the current movement. “People often ask me why I titled my book 'The War for Kindness',” he said, implying that kindness and fighting are incompatible. “I don't think they are. In a culture of increasing inequality, loneliness and anger, we must fight back to reclaim our common humanity. In today's world, kindness is a radical act.”
One day one of my children came home from school having been bullied by a neighbor. At first, my husband and I were indignant and thought surely if the parent is made aware, the situation will right itself. Instead, after discussion our child took cookies to the door of the neighbor guilty of bullying. There never was another incidence with bullying from that neighbor. Now I'm not naive enough to think that chocolate chip cookies will solve the severe and brutal injustices that occur. I'm not so ignorant to believe that just being kind solves all world ills. I'm not suggesting we do away with courts, law and punishments. But I am simple enough to believe that beginning within ourselves, our families and in our homes, we can add kindness. It's possible the sum of many simple kind words and acts are the math will make the world that much better.
A fascinating ancient war story is told of a war loving group that came to know God's love and wanted to show their remorse for their blood thirsty past. They literally dug a pit and threw their weapons in. Yes, in future wars, some died without their weapons, but many of their aggressors, changed their lives because of the humility and conviction of those they were killing.
In the popular movie of the 50's, Ben Hur, the main character Judah Ben Hur is obsessed with revenge for the malicious and hardened Masala, who betrayed him and caused him years of slavery in the galleys and imprisonment for his sister and mother. Esther, a family servant watching this anger and says in a moment of truth to Ben Hur, "It is as if you had become Masala!" If we are not careful we can become what we hate. We can be guilty of what we accuse.
Looking inward at who we are and for any way we might be contributing to the problem is the first step toward healing. Acknowledging, and appreciating the legion of kind acts during this pandemic by individuals, families, neighborhoods, companies, and groups everywhere who see a need and take action can help us focus on the kindness that is part of our global DNA. Taking active steps to live with respect and dignity towards others and teaching our children is another critical step. Every response that pushes the darkness back brings a little more light and kindness into this world. Let it begin with each of us.
