"She Had Compassion"

I recently fell in love with a painting and we (the painting and I) had a long conversation.  It is titled "She Had Compassion." by Elspeth Young.
https://www.alyoung.com/art/work-daughter_of_pharaoh.html
The painting was of Pharaoh's daughter pulling Moses out of the river. One could observe the tender hands and loving desire to save this baby from the death decree of a fearful Pharaoh that male babies must be thrown in the river. The record states the princess saves the infant and later raises him in the Egyptian palace. She could not have known that day the life she saved would one day lead his people out of Egyptian bondage, save the entire Israelite nation, and be revered as a prophet for four thousand years.  

As I pondered the sequence of events that led to lifting this baby out of the river of death, I find four very different women who were key players in saving the Moses that saved a nation.

The first in this quartet is Shiprah. I deeply admire that she defied the destructive instructions from Pharaoh to kill the Hebrew male babies born while serving as midwife. The record states that the Lord dealt well with her and Puah who likewise refused to kill the male babies.

The second is Jochabed, the mother of Moses who carefully hid the infant and then set him out in the ark basket that without intervention would have become his casket. She protected that life, most likely at risk of her own life, with faith in God.

Miriam, sister to Moses, is the third in this narrative, who watches and protects the basket as it comes to the fourth woman in this life giving, life protecting quartet, Pharaoh's daughter. The record states, "she had compassion" and lifted him from the river.

I identify with these four women.  I love that each are so different, yet acted on the deepest feelings and gifts within to give and protect life. The choice of motherhood presented to Pharaoh's daughter resonates deeply with me. My family is my choice. It has not failed me in any way to bring continual joy, personal growth and increased capacity in a difficult and profoundly rewarding path. Motherhood gives me the gifts of deep meaning and satisfaction. Nurturing life has been brought education and knowledge about divine and earthly priorities. Both the slave and the princess chose the gifts of female biology and divine nature. There are Shiprahs and Miriams today as well, women who give strength and support to each other in the most influential calling and career.

The image of lifting from the river has repeatedly been impressed on my mind for days.  From a murky, treacherous river of lies, doubt and destruction mothers today courageously, and fearlessly live, defend and testify of the truth that mothers are the stabilizing force of society and change lives every day. I applaud mothers who act on the understanding that babies are the greatest force for good in the world. I cheer mothers who seek to nurture their children to achieve their highest potential. I revere mothers who defy the current culture of self-serving lies that demean motherhood and choose to act on the deepest feelings of their soul to give and protect life. While these four women may not have exactly known the identity of this baby, they each acted on their understanding of their divine identity. The painting "She Had Compassion" continues to teach me of eternal identity, the gift of compassion, and inspires me to lift from the river again and again and again.

Listen and Learn

You have probably heard the story of the frustrated mother who told her little boy in exasperation, "I've told you not to go past the corner," and he innocently replies, "Mom what's a corner?" We 've all done it.  I've reprimanded a child only to find out they had already done their chores or were sick. We didn't listen or find out. We made assumptions or missed the bigger picture.

I sense there is a problem like that in our world. We think we understand it so well, perhaps thinking why don't people fall in line, only to find out, we made assumptions and missed something.

In this sureness, we find it easy to criticize, blame and label. Sound familiar? So easy to do in our homes, on social media and in the marketplace. In our frustration, we are eager to march in a march, join a cause, or shout a loud refrain. Surely banding together with like minded people will solve problems or so we think.

What is missing? I'm struck by an answer given by David Brooks: 

"I’m beginning to think the whole depressing spectacle of this moment — the Trump presidency and beyond — is caused by a breakdown of intellectual virtue, a breakdown in America’s ability to face evidence objectively, to pay due respect to reality, to deal with complex and unpleasant truths. The intellectual virtues may seem elitist, but once a country tolerates dishonesty, incuriosity and intellectual laziness, then everything else falls apart."                 David Brooks, "Find a Way to Roll Back Fanaticism," New York Times, Aug 15, 2017 

At least part of the answer seems to be we need to learn, seek answers, and find out more information. This takes work, time and effort. Without this honest and curious capacity to learn, things fall apart. Applying introspective honesty, we may find part of the problem lies within ourselves. This takes courage to pursue. How can we approach the complex and difficult issues with a wider lens? In the wake of "Walk Out," and "Women's March," and with the understanding that I believe most of us want to reduce violence and give equality to women, I suggest the following: 

• Make the intellectual effort to understand the cause, its founders, its purpose and its founding principles and documents.  
• Listen to what both sides have to say and why they feel the way they do.
• Research who wants this cause/event/march/philosophy.
• What will be the result for individual people and their freedom?
• What will be the result for groups of people and nations?
• Who will benefit from this cause/event/philosophy?
• What has happened historically with this concept/event/cause?
• Will the means achieve the ends? Are there other paths to that end?
• What effect will this have on children?

To put things back together, we simply must look past the tiny lens of our own experience and listen and learn. Not too long ago I sat in a committee room at the state capitol on a very divisive issue. After asking a young man nearby, why he was for the bill in question, I realized that there were many ways to look at the issue, and people see solutions in a variety of ways. We would do well to listen more, learn more, and ask critical questions. Only then may we realize that we all have pieces of the solution.

I Live in Abundance of Time

I grabbed crackers, cheese, water and make-up again on my way to the car. Not enough time again! Why do I do this? Again! I don’t have enough time. Again! The phrase "I don't have enough time," has crept subtly in my mind and wreaked havoc.

Why is there never enough time? While it is a given that days and events begin and end, and specific times and places are not ongoing and unending, it is also clear that I have created a scarcity mentality! Accomplishments, souls and relationships do not thrive in a scarcity mindset. Mirror mirror on the wall, I am my own brick wall after all! 

I admire my brother who always has time for me. He has more responsibility than almost anyone I know yet treats me like he has all the time in the world. I have marveled at this, because I often fail to make time to listen while plagued with the "I don't have enough time" syndrome.

I have marveled at my dads now famous Saturday statement: "Boy we got a lot done today!" Thinking somehow he and my brother cut a deal in heaven's time wheel, I now realize it is a product of priority and abundance mentality. This is the understanding that there are enough resources and success for all to spare and to share.

Enter new hourly phrase: I live in abundance of time, order, and joy. What is amazing to me is change comes from the simple declaration! Like the decree for light, it seems that declaring time now means there is time. Immediately I noticed I got more done, and felt more content while being able to let go of what I didn’t get done. Last night armed with my new phrase, I did not go straight to my teenage daughter with "Did you this?" and "Did you that?" - the conversation that annihilates joy. Instead I asked a question about her favorite music. And I listened. And another question. And validation. Joy! Because...  I live in abundance of time, order, and joy.  

My new recommendation list for keeping the abundance mindset: Be grateful, find joy in simplicity, look for the good, avoid judging, cheer others on, see opportunity, listen and declare often, I live in abundance of time, order and joy.

 For the earth is full, and there is enough and to spare; 

Doctrine and Covenants 104:17

My Tractor Pin

I now wear a tractor pin. My Dad passed away this month and a family member bought tractor pins for his posterity. My Dad loved tractors, and the soil that it tilled and the garden that came from the soil. He loved even more having a child or grandchild by his side on the tractor and in the projects. The tractor is symbolic of his magnificent efforts to encourage the rising generation to have character, a work ethic and skills. 

The pin reminds of his generosity. He put up hundreds of bottles of peaches, beets, beans, applesauce, and tomatoes every year. He gave away wheelbarrow loads of melons and bushels of tomatoes. He gave to the neighbors, family, widows and refugees. He helped my family till our soil, plant our corn and put up tomatoes. With 10 canners going we could put up over 200 quarts of tomatoes in a day!

The pin reminds me to work hard and take responsibility.He would get up often before 6:00 am, head out to the garden, then to the office, then back in the evening to the garden. On Saturday he would work by the side of children or grandchildren teaching them landscaping, mowing lawns, planting and fixing sprinkler pipes. He would work through till 9 or 10 at night and say "Boy we got a lot done!" And he was so HAPPY! He loved every minute. The next day he would call and tell me what great workers my children are.


The pin reminds me of his continual learning.  He loved the New Testament and had 600 scriptures memorized. On his bedstand was Paul's Life and Letters, the scriptures, Consumer Reports and The Blueprint of Christ's Church. 

My dad understood that people who work side by side, in the soil, grow food, and share generously, develop character, and solve their problems. He could see the generational power of transferring values by loving and working with the rising generation. It wasn't about food, it was about empowering and changing the lives of those he loved.

Here is my poem about the pin:

My Dad smiled all the day; 

HIs heavy work was clearly play. 

He got up early before the dawn,

Tilled the field and mowed the lawn. 

Often with a child at side, 

Then on the tractor for a ride.

He gave freely with a smile,

And worked long past the extra mile. 

He memorized large amounts of scripture. 

And was a counselor, friend and teacher. 

He didn't criticize or complain,

Nor make excuses or find blame. 

So it becomes a little harder to sin 

When I wear my tractor pin.

Best Gifts Ever!

I love hearing the phrase in December, "What shall I give?"  We want to give. We want to give something the receiver will love!  We want to give something that symbolizes our love for them. We want that joyful feeling that comes from giving the perfect gift.  

My daughter gave the sweetest joyful gift, and I want to share the joy.  Short on funds and time, she googled best gift ever, and formulated the following: 

One certificate gave each of us Permission to be Happy.  She informed each of us that we had permission to be happy. Funny how that simple phrase made me laugh and realize a gift I had all along without realizing.  The next page explained the best gift is a hug, and she gave each of us a hug. The third gift was a gift of her time. That commodity we hold so tightly and she gave so freely.  With ten members in our family, it was no small gift:

It was a sweet experience to see each child give to their brothers and sisters something that symbolized their love and illustrate they had thought about that person, their wants, and needs. Bless each one for their kind examples. And bless Amanda! Thanks for showing us that so often the best gifts are those of self.

"A beautiful heart can bring things into your life 

that all the money in the world couldn't obtain." 

-Dau Voire

Every Day Matters

There are "everyday days", where nothing earthshaking or monumental seems to be happening that seem to contrast to what I call "formal days", where final events and changes take place. This month I sent my son to Mexico for training, then on to Chile to teach people about the healing that comes from Jesus Christ.  On this formal day, the suitcases were closed and put in the car, final pictures taken, tender hugs exchanged and goodbyes said. He walked through security and my eyes followed him until I couldn't see him any more no matter how hard I squinted my tear filled eyes and strained my neck. Where did the time go? Where is my little boy? And who is this strong man facing forward to new adventures? What led up to this formal day that marks the end of a season and the beginning of another? I realized that the seemingly long time that led up to the parting is made of "everyday days" and "everyday moments."

Sigh. Joy. Gratitude. Happiness. Sadness. Admiration. Longing. Goodness. Memories. Adoration. Pain. Growth. Love. On and on, the flood of feelings is relentless.  Before my mind are memories of beautiful moments and great gratitude that I could be a part of this wonderful person's life who now goes out to bless others in this world. The stark realization came a few weeks ago that each moment of "everyday days" has so much power and potential for warmth, joy and good memories. And that is the point.  There really are no "everyday days," if that means ordinary. I took advantage of small moments in the previous weeks, to give an extra hug, listen and share my encouragement and faith in him. Every day matters in the daily summation of experiences. Every day has the potential to lift and bring light. Every day can provide opportunities for simple memories. Every day matters.

A sweet friend of mine shared an idea from a friend of hers who wrote nightly in her journal: "I'm glad I did..."  and "I wish I had..." Then the next day she got up and did what she wished she had done. Oh how I love that!  So I started.  And usually I find I wish I had said, "I love you," or listened better. So the next day I say and do what I wished I had done! Bless that wonderful mom for that fabulous idea! Today I see more clearly how every day matters and is leading towards ends and beginnings. Today I resolve to begin and end more days with deliberate expressions of love to those around me. Today I consciously acknowledge that the seemingly uneventful is full of power and potential. 

You will never have this day with your children again. Tomorrow they will be a little bigger then they are today. This day is a gift. Breathe and notice. ...Enjoy today ...           It will be over before you know it. 

-Jen Hatmaker

Remember the Rice

We did an experiment recently. We talked to rice. Seriously, we did. I had two jars of cooked rice and gave instructions to my family to talk very nicely to the jar full of rice marked "love."  A second jar of rice was marked "hate" and passed around with instructions to talk meanly into that jar.  Why would anyone do such a thing?  Well, I heard two motivational speakers share this idea with large audiences and I wanted to give it a try. So with a few strange looks from my family, statements like "You cute little rice, you are so darling!  You always do the right thing!  We are so proud of you," were spoken to those little grains in the love jar. Statements like "You are terrible! I am so disappointed," and the like were spoken to those little grains in the hate jar.  Then they were both shoved back into a dark corner of the pantry.  A couple of months later I pulled them out and this is what I saw:

I was stunned.  My family would not have believed it had they not seen it with their own eyes. What a difference! Now I know this little family exercise was not carried out with scientific precision. Nevertheless, the results were shocking and their implications for our daily conversation about how we believe in each other and treat each other were even more compelling. Words have power!

Similarly, Masaru Emoto; a Japanese author and researcher born in 1934, conducted experiments that showed words and thoughts can change the molecular structure of water.  He is well known for the water crystals created when he labeled bottles of water then placed them in subzero temperatures and photographed the crystals.  The results are here: Dr Masaru Emoto's Water Experiment - Words are Alive!  Learning of his experiments and seeing the rice give new understanding to the power of words.  When conversations get a little tense here, we say, "Remember the RIce."  Or "Don't hurt my inner rice." 

When you finish reading this, you will have opportunities to share all kinds of words. What will they be? Will they be healing or hurtful? Kind or curt? Joyful or jabbing? Clearly they will have more impact than we might ever have imagined. Literally, we have the opportunity before us to create a better world, word by word every day. 

 Gentle words bring life and health; 
a deceitful tongue crushes the spirit.
-Proverbs 15:4